ChecK It Out - "Dipping My Toe In"

Jump over to my personal blog to read what's on my heart today...

"Dipping My Toe In"

Double Down - Mom "Hack"

I've been doing this Mom-Thang for over 20 years.  

Every parent stashes a few survival tricks up their sleeve.  With the internet and great wide web world, we can now share our moments of genius with more than just our playgroup friends.

Occassionally, I've shared one of my most enlightened ideas with a few friends or family on Facebook or even at a baby shower.  Usually it is well received.  So I just decided to share this tip on my blogs today.

Sleep is sacred in our home.  From the day we brought home our first little one, we longed for every precious second of sleep we could squeeze from each precious night.  However, we quickly discovered that the nighttime hours hold numerous, unexpected, mysterious challenges for parents.

Frankly?

Poop,

Pee,

&

Puke

just happen!

Waking in the middle of the night faced with the task of not only calming a child and meeting their nighttime needs while simultaneously juggling dirty bedding and remaking a bed to achieve a clean and dry sleeping area created an exhausting adrenaline rush. 

Call me lazy!  

There had to be a better way!

I had discovered the wonders of Waterproof Mattress Pads!  These were amazing for preventing damage to our mattress, but there had to be a way to maximize their powers for good...

DOUBLE DOWN

Materials needed:

2 sheet sets

2 waterproof mattress pads

(These are the minimun required.  You could increase the quantity, dependent on your needs.)

1.  Place a waterproof mattress pad on the bed.  

2.  Make the bed with the first sheet set; however, do not place the pillowcases on the pillows.

3.  Lay the pillowcases flat at the head of the bed.

4.  Cover the sheets with the second waterproof mattress pad.

5.  Make the bed with the second set of sheets.

Tah-dah!

That's it!

Now, when the next middle of the night crisis happens, you just slip off the first layer of sheets and toss them into the washing machine.  Underneath is a freshly made bed!  Slip your little one back under the covers and dive into your own bed as quickly as possible.

I will admit that there have been nights when the next step, after round two or three, was to toss out a sleeping bag until sheets and bedding were clean and dry.  Most times, having at least that extra layer was enough to calm and comfort a child back to sleep.  A whole lot less stressful on them and me!  

As my college girl has discovered, this family trick has also worked well in her storage challenged, microscopic dorm room.  Her roommate throught she was a little crazy on that first day but has later agreed that it works really well.

Even in our large family's home, it saves a tons of linen closet storage space to store extra sets of sheets on the beds.  

Adoption Is Hard!

I’ve started writing, trying to begin writing, writing bits and pieces for the book everyone asks about and for the speaking and teaching I’m feeling called to begin.  Today, I have some words, emotions, and feelings that need to pour out, need to flow and find an audience somewhere outside of my mind and tears streaming down my cheeks.

Adoption is hard. 

It is more than a single event in time and space, more than papers signed or a judge’s decree.  Adoption is a daily struggle, an exhausting and draining daily battle to love.

Adoptive families wage war against the brokenness, loss, and grief that has created beauty, hope, and joy mingled with our tears and strife.  Seemingly insignificant moments of everyday life represent enormous advances and defeats within our homes and families hidden from the world outside. 

As parents, we secretly struggle to find answers and assistance.  The adoptive community is not our clique but our safe haven and retreat.  Finding comrades and companions who provide understanding and encouragement is one of the many obstacles we face.  I thank the Lord for the friends, mentors, and relationships with those who have held my hand, wrapped me in hugs, and kept me from drowning when life has overwhelmed me.  Most of these precious and dearly loved individuals in my life, I have never met face-to-face or rarely ever am physically near.  The internet and cyber world has allowed me access to a community of allies.

Still, today, my heart aches for so many, so many friends and families who are hurting and struggling, exhausted and drained from this daily, moment-by-moment battle we face.

Our children fight against us while we fight for them.  They push away as we try to draw them closer.  Master manipulators and strategists utilize other adults and relationships as weapons of warfare -emotional triangulation, condemnation, and isolation to achieve tactical advantages.  They hide and run from us and from their own deep pain.  Rages mask fears and hurt.  Silent escape into worlds within themselves or the busyness and distraction of life outside our home and family provide walls and barriers to challenge our ability to reach their hurting hearts. 

A bottomless pit or endless black hole, drains, strips, and exhausts us to our core as they try to fill this vacuum within.  They literally want it all – material possessions, the warmth of physical touch, words of encouragement and praise, singularly focused attention, pleasing through performance and perfection, the adrenaline rush and thrill of all life has to offer.  Yet nothing satisfies, nothing fills the void.  They long for love but do not know how to receive it when offered.  Their spirits seek peace but reject its comfort and contentment.

My heart hurts today for my mama friends in the trenches with me.  I know too many downtrodden, depressed, and struggling families.  Their hearts and homes are torn apart.  They are bleeding and wounded within. 

Father God, I don’t have the words to pray.  Spirit, intercede for us.  Give voice to the cries of our hearts. Jehovah Jireh, provide for our needs.  Jehovah Rophi, heal our hearts and our homes.  Bind the wounds that have cut so deep within our children’s lives and past.  Pour the oil and wine over us today with the hope and promise of Your healing to come.  I thank You and praise You today for the beauty You are creating from the brokenness and ashes of our lives and our stories for Your glory.

The Lost Day - July 17th

When you travel to the other side of the world, day becomes nigha and night becomes day and you lose a day.

Our team all woke up early on July 16th to begin our taveling adventures, only to land in Beijing late in the afternnon on Jyuly 17th.  Just enough time to drop off luggage at the hotel and then attempt to keep your eyes open while eating your first dinner in China with your Guide.

Our GUIDE!

Delia

<3  <3  <3

Day One - a stranger meets you in the airport.

She is you constant companion for the next 10 days or so.  She selects the food you eat.  Negotiates where you will sleep.  Translates a world of words you don't understand.  Keeps you safe.  Shares her life with you as you share yours with her.

Day Ten 9 you both weep inconsolably as you leave you newest BFF and dearest lifelong friend.

You can call that - Foreshadowing!

Back to our Friday night...

Luggage in our rooms and a little freshened up, off we trooped to dinner!  Delia led the way to a noodle restaurant.  Walking was a great way to stretch our legs and take in some of the sights along our way.

Hungry and thirsty, weary travelers were usherd to tables to await our dinner.  

I truly enjoy the adventure of eating in China!  So when our guide asked if anyone wanted spicy noodles, I happily volunteered. 

Gradually, dishes began to appear on our table.

These were just all the side dishes.  Our noodle bowls hadn't even arrived yet. 

And my spicy noodles too!

Delicious dinner!

Since I wasn't the only one snapping pictures with my camera, you get to enjoy this beautiful pic of Miranda and I slurping our noodles with the best of them.

With our tummies all full, it was time to march back to our hotel so we could all attempt to get a good night's sleep before we spent the next day touring Beijing.  (The touring part of the trip has a dual purpose.  It's wonderful to see the historic sites and learn more about Chinese history, but equally important is our need to flip our internal clock by spending an active day out in the sunshine, or rain clouds.)

So if you're ever in Beijing and looking for a great noodle shop, here's a look at the sign out front.

Walking back to our hotel at night allowed us to take in even more of the sites in this great city, as well as noting many of the cultural differences for many members of our team who had never visited China before.

 As we arrived back at our hotel, we stopped into a convenience stores right next door to purchase water and a few snacks.  Uhm...but not any of the wine in the background!  Miranda and I also decided to introduce this team to the "Try It Game" we had learned from our teammate, Gretchen, last year.  Buying something unexpected just to sample something new and different.

Off to bed we went, excited to finally be in China.  

Miranda and I both thought we might burst with the anticipation and expectation of being so much closer to the orphanage but still two days away from seeing the children and staff we love so dearly and have missed so greatly this past year.

And They're Off - Thursday, July 16th

I gave up trying to post while in China!  Sorry, World!  It was just too much for my computer, VPN, and tired body to manage.  If you are a Facebook Friend, you might have followed along on the special group page our team set up for friends and family.

Now that I'm home and slightly recovered for jet lag, I plan to recap our trip by posting highlights from each day.  Then my passionate side will take over and I hope to pour out all the stories of these amazing children!

July 16th - The day I could hardly wait for and equally dreaded!

I made a pact with God on our return flight home from our first adoption in 2009.  I informed Him that I was NEVER EVER getting back on an airplane to fly to China!!!!  However, I was wise enough to add the disclaimer, "Unless it is Your will."

UGH!

A second adoption trip and now two mission trips later, with another mission trip planned to return in November and even one for the summer of 2016...His will overrides my fear of flying for hours in a sardine can!  My oldest daughter Miranda will tell you truthfully that these flights just about kill me every time.  I can't stand sitting still for that long and struggle to sleep on airplanes.

Our team met together for the first time in the Chicago O'Hare Airport.  Uhm...I think this airport my qualify as my vacation home from all the time I've spent waiting for flights over the years?

Our team consisted of six tween/teenage girls and five adults, if you count my 19-year-old daughter as an adult.  She quickly discovered that she fell into that abyss of not quite a teen and not quite an adult.  Bummer.  At the orphanage, she will always be my daughter, which equals never an adult.  But she is beyond middle school and high school drama which made it difficult to fit in with 12 to 16 year old girls.  However, with her heart to serve and love on the children, age doesn't matter.

As our team gathered to wait for our flight, we exchanged some bracelets.  One of the girls had created a cross bracelet for everyone.  We had brought along enough "Pray for China" bracelets for everyone too.

Snacking on Subway sandwiches or playing card games (which became a little violent and caused injuries before we had even taken off) filled our time until we step on board that 747 to take us all half way around the world, and closer to the children we longed to love.

again…Again…AGAIN!!!

I'm going back!  

Thursday morning I step on an airplane to fly back to see the kiddos and staff!

Hopefully, this year my internet will work better while I'm in country so that I can post here more frequently.  Thank you to all who have helped us with our fine raising efforts!  Thank you for all your prayers and support!

To help guide your prayers for our team:

Thursday 7/16 - Friday 7/17  -  Team flies to Beijing
Saturday 7/18  -  Touring in Beijing to reset our jet-lagged, internal clock to China time
Sunday 7/19  -  Fly to the city we will serve in for dinner with the director and his staff
Monday 7/20  -  Return to my heart's second home to the smiles, laughter, and mischievous, dancing eyes I've missed so much.

Tuesday 7/21 - Thursday 7/23  -  LOVE on the staff and children!
Friday 7/24  -  Say good-bye again.  Ugh!  My heart hurts already at the thought.  But this time, I will say good-bye knowing I will return with another team in November.  (Still a few openings for volunteers to join this Storyteller Missions team (Storyteller Missions November 2015 trip information).
Saturday 7/25  -  Leave to fly to Guangzhou
Sunday 7/26   -  Touring in Guangzhou.  Because we have several teenage adoptees returning to serve with this team, this trip includes an couple extra days to allow them to see more of their birth country  I'm already struggling with this extra time.  Last year, my heart was so shattered after we left the children that all I wanted to do was run home to my family.
Monday 7/27  -  Flight back to Beijing
Tuesday 7/28  -  Long day and long flights…Home Sweet Home!

Guest Post - 13-Year-Old Needs a Family

A recent Storyteller Missions team visited another Chinese orphanage and met a young man with one simple wish for a FAMILY!  At 13 years old, he only has months left before his 14th birthday will remove this hope he clings to.  Please read the words of one of the team members who longs to see his wish come true - 

Before you light your first sparkler of the weekend or cut that watermelon, I need to share with you about a boy I met a couple months ago.

I keep sitting here trying to think of clever ways to convince someone that this 13 year boy is more worthy of adopting than the thousands and thousands of others who are available. But I just can't. The fact is, EVERY child deserves a mom and dad. Every child deserves a home with parents cheering them on to find their dreams. Every child should have birthday cakes with candles and friends singing that familiar happy birthday song, year after year after year. EVERY child deserves this.

So what could I possibly say about this shy, 13 year old to help his God-chosen parents to take the step he needs before he ages out in just a few short months? Before we know it, we'll be returning to school, planning fall break vacations, celebrating Thanksgiving and picking out a tree... Meanwhile he waits, day after day after day, wondering if anyone might want to share those memories with him? Isn't he is worth family traditions and memories too? Hasn't life thrown him enough difficulties being deaf in a world that communicates so much with spoken words? I know he questions whether or not he's worth it. He told me so. 

We spent hours together one day. I spoke in English to his 17 year friend named "Star." She either wrote in Chinese to him, or tried to sign to him to understand my questions. He waited patiently. Patiently. How many 13 year old boys wait patiently to answer personal questions about themselves? Maybe that makes him special. I'm sure the fact that he loves    sports and video games and would rather be with friends than in school, doesn't make him any different.

I asked him what he wanted to be when he grows up and his friend said he just wants to be with a family. What 13 year old makes the need to be with his family a priority over being a basketball player or football super star? Maybe that sets him apart too. Most 13 year old kids are preoccupied with name brands and the latest technology, and I had to show him how to take a selfie. Maybe that sets him apart too.

Don't consider this boy because you feel sorry for him. Not at all. This boy is a champion. He lives in a home with hundreds of children and none of them know sign language. No, this boy is a supreme communicator. He's learned to get his needs met without screaming and sassing his care takers. I'm certain that sets him apart from most 13 year olds I know, too.

But I think what sets him apart most for me, if I want to get to the heart of the matter... wasn't that he is about to age out. It wasn't even that he is deaf. It was the inquisitive nature in his eyes that seemed to be asking me, "Will you find my mom?" As I spent those hours with him, drinking in his shyness, marveling at his patience, all other children around seemed to melt away, because I saw him as a son. He was made to be a son, not an orphan.

There IS a parent for him.

We need to find them. No perfect parent need apply. He told me he didn't need a perfect family. If you have room in your heart to love a 13 year old who dreams of family, loves sports and has beat the odds of communicating so much that he does well at school, we have found your son. He is waiting. And we have been praying that you would step forward to begin making those back-to-school, vacation, holiday, birthday memories with him.

Is it you? Are you ready to take him in? Are you the one we've been praying for? If so, please email Kelly at kraudenbush@sparrow-fund.org for the next step.